


Only Yesterday

by mandyb1961



Category: Holby City
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-05-02 00:23:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19188172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mandyb1961/pseuds/mandyb1961
Summary: Bernie and Serena still very much in love in their twilight years.





	Only Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

> been writing and re writing this since Feb hope it's okay it might have been written by someone a lot more talented than me so please forgive me writing my version of events.

My name is Bernie Wolfe or to give you my formal title it's Major Berience Grizelda Wolfe MBE, I had earned that for not just my Army career but to my innovative work as a trauma surgeon in civilian life. Doctor Digby always loved to tease me by saying I put the fear of god into her and other F1s until they got to know the Wolfe better, and she would add to the new F1s I wasn’t all bite and bark. Which doesn't work here it’s as if they just viewed me as another in mate who needs their help more than they need mine. It felt like it was only yesterday I was in charge of an army trauma unit, being blown up and back into civilian life, which I struggled with until I met Serena Campbell.  
  
I was due a visitor to my new home, Sunny days, dear God who comes up with these names for any Residential and Dementia care home; our home is your home. Really I can just about remembered my home and it certainly didn't look like this or even the one I shared with Marcus and the kids before it went pear shaped. Where was I yes that's right I was expecting a visit, from a young cadet from my old regiment. Berkshire Rifles that became while I was still in the Army the 5th Battalion. my girlfriend seems strange considering our age to call her that pointed out it might be fun, shared knowledge of how the Army works etc., I looked at her and I was instantly taken back to the first time we met and she had a twinkle in her eye then, we were both a lot younger and I hadn’t separated from Marcus then I always look back on that day in the car park as our first unofficial first date. So I agreed and we had a brief telephone conversation and we both came to the same conclusion that it would be good to have my time in the army and put in writing, I did have to write a Regimental Journal but I never really talked about my personal time in the Army. And when I was at Holby I kept a ramshackle diary of sorts. When Serena and I were together we never really discussed it I didn’t feel I was up to trying to explain what I had witnessed or had to do as a medic.  
  
As usual my belly told me it was time to get up I got a chuckle and a sleepy voice said “go back to barracks’ Major I’ll join you shortly.”  
  
I smiled to myself I never tire of hearing her sleepy voice “I need to check when Cadet Elisabeth Jackson is coming.” I slowly got out of the lovely warm bed, I instantly missed the back of my sleepy partner, she never liked getting up in the morning and always left it to the very last minute, I kissed the back of her silver grey hair, it never did go white unlike my own, I reluctantly pulled on my dressing gown and went back to my own barracks. I had barely made it back when there was a sharp knock on my door, "yes, yes coming" silently praying it wasn't whatshername. "Mrs Wolfe breakfast is ready, or do. " she was still in mid sentence but up as soon shut up as opened the door opened, gave me a half hearted smile, "would you like your breakfast in your room or in the dinning room, I muttered back that I need to get dressed, and would have breakfast in the dinning room, I took a newspaper and bid her farewell for now. I shut the door and heard her knock on next door, because she got no answer she moved on.  
  
After I had my shower I picked up my glasses and looked at the calendar Cadet Jackson was due on Tuesday and today was Sunday, so much for a cuddle and a lie in. I picked up one of the papers and it was a couple months old, I stated at the date 17 August 2038 which made me 85 years of age and my sleeping companion 85 too. Why did that date leap out at me, think, think.  
  
I smiled to myself when I passed my secret love's door, and made my way to my usual chair, I nodded good morning to several other in mates I mean residents. I sat down with a thump and a groan, got several nods pained recognition as no of us were getting any younger. Jessica I think its Jessica came over with a smile, this one a genuine one which prompted me to smile back. "Good morning Bernie usual breakfast, or do you fancy a change." "Good morning," I paused to read her name on her badge, " Jenny yes please" close enough knew it started with a J.  
  
She smiled again, and said “don’t; forget you’ve got a visitor today,” I looked at her with a puzzled look, “yes on Tuesday today’s Sunday so I’ve got plenty of time to get organised.” She sat down next to me and replied softly “Bernie today’s Tuesday not Sunday I’ll get your breakfast before it gets cold” I didn’t reply other than giving her a nod, a quiet expletive I thought to myself damn this disease, I would get prompts on trivial matters, that’s why I struggled to remember why the 17th August was important I can recall a fancy invitation had a gold and silver border I do recall that but other than that I couldn’t quite place it for the moment so, I opened the paper and quickly scanned it and some how ended at the obituary section, and there she was Lieutenant Alexandra Dawson, she had died of cancer aged 75, then if that wasn't a big enough kick in the stomach, I suddenly remembered the date it was the date it all went to hell again. That’s when it came back to me it the invitation was a wedding one to mine and Alex’s. Serena and I had kept in touch during my time in Kenya and subsequent other travels and it was while I was in Holland of all places I met up with Alex again, and parted again until we had met up at a old regimental reunion, a good 5 years after Serena and I'd split up.  
  
I'd heard through Cam, St James's were looking for general come trauma surgeon in the A & E dept, despite Marcus moving on with his new wife I still hesitated when I did eventually did a tentative phone-call, and more or less got promised the job. For once my reputation worked in my favour; it didn't take long for me to settle into my new job, which came with an apartment at a reduced rent. It was while I was treating a RTA, a squadie from my old regiment we got talking, and he mentioned up an coming reunion.  
  
I reluctantly gave him my email details not just because of Alex, and my lack of not getting in touch and her finding out about Serena through the gossip grapevine. I wasn't sure if I was up to seeing her, I'd forgotten about the reunion when, I got a formal invitation in the post, it said + one, I felt tempted to call Serena and quickly dismissed the idea. She knew I was back, and we had spoke on the phone and even had a meal but nothing more.  
  
Jenny appeared with my coffee and porridge, just the way I liked it with golden syrup rather than salt or sugar. I looked at the smiling face of Alex and I was taken back again to the day of our or should that be our wedding.  
  
17th August 2019, it was beginning to rain, not hard a sort of muzzy warm kind day. Cam offered or was that ordered to be my best-man, I was wearing my dress uniform and Alex by soul mate, my friend who'd saved my life was on her way. We'd did up again at the regimental reunion, at first it was a bit awkward and lots of ums and silences but soon it was as if we'd never parted, I did mention the Kenyan trauma until that prompted Serena and me, going our separate ways. I didn't or wanted to be reminded of her cheating on me with junior Doctor Faulkner and me forgiving her but it not being enough. To her credit she never pushed a reason for us not being together, she was just to my inability to convey how I was feeling or how I felt when we served together, more than once she had to duck out of the way of a incoming mug hitting the wall.  
  
The was how Alex and I tentatively started seeing each other as friends and soon we became lovers again, it was as though we'd never been apart, the only difference we didn't need to hide how we felt about each other or maybe more importantly not keeping one ear open to the slightest sound. Not worry about being found out, it was bliss while it lasted.  
  
To say my children Cameron and Charlotte were understanding and forgiving, well let's put it like this no, not 100%. They only victory of you can call it that was they'd forgiven me, and grudgingly tolerated Alex and if I am truthful the feeling might be mutual. I looked at my watch that fateful day and compared it to the one the wall. I don't know why but every time I looked at Cameron, he couldn't totally look me in eye. I know the bride is allowed to be late but this was really cutting it fine, because she always berated me if I was 5 minutes late and she was more than 15. Even the registrar was looking annoyed and fed up all at once.  
  
"Um mum,"  
  
" yes Cameron. " he knew I was being serious ever since he was a little boy he flinched when he was called Cameron, in a certain way he paused looked at the clock, floor then finally at me.  
  
"I am so sorry I don't think she's coming, Lottie called me late last night she said she'd gone around to Alex's and told her that you never really loved her and she was just a poor substitute for Serena. Lottie sounded drunk, I called earlier this morning and she couldn't remember the phone call, until I played it back, she said she doesn't regret telling her."  
  
I looked at him in disbelief, and took out my phone and called Alex it went straight to voice mail I left the message "Alex please call me." I apologised to the registrar and started to walk away from both her and Cam, who started to talk then shouting at me but I didn't want to listen, so I just said over my shoulder. “Leave me alone I need to think.”  
  
I can't remember where I went, one of blessings of this disease I guess, I do remember I kept trying to call her I even went to our flat and she wasn't there. I tried everyone I knew who might know where she is or where she was, with no luck they thought she was with me. I did notice though one or two might have been lying and who could have blamed them especially when I promised in front of them I would never hurt Alex again.  
  
I kept trying and the hours bled into days, then weeks and months with no luck. Then one day two years on what should have been our special day I had a text from a number I couldn't trace simply stating that Alex was okay and wished me well with Serena. The only problem was I wasn't with her, I hadn't been with anyone since that day, I never did get any kind of apology of sorts from Charlotte.  
  
If I am honest I did think more than once of contacting Serena as I'd heard through Fletch she was seeing someone not thankfully that F1, but a surgeon from St James. And to her undying credit she never mentioned Serena other than me a professional manner. Could it be true as the kids had said Serena was my true love and like I said to Dom on the roof all those years ago very much the one.  
  
Then out of the blue I got an invitation to go to Guinevere's confirmation, how could she be 12 years old where did that time go, it was Greta's mum's idea as she was a practising Catholic. I had kept in touch with Jason and Greta so I guess I shouldn't have been totally surprised at the invite. We had polity discussed Serena in passing but nothing more, but he did look sad maybe remorseful possibly remembering his conversation with Auntie Serena about slippers and bins.  
  
Despite it being a + one I went on my day it was a gorgeous sunny summer day, I was wearing my favourite suit, and of course she was there looking stunning as usual not looking much different from our last dinner “date” which was five years previously. Our eyes connected and we gave each other shy smiles, I didn't notice the woman she was with it certainly wasn't' Jemma from St James. I heard before I saw him Mikie, “they're not an item dad said Katherine wants to be, but Serena said that there was only one for her and she screwed it up.” I looked at the young man, “I know the feeling.”  
But that was all in the past and I silently wished Alex love God speed and eternal peace.  
  
I was jolted out of my memories, by a chair being occupied opposite me, "Good morning Major." I looked up into a familiar face and a smile that reached her eyes, I simply nodded. Jenny came over to put a cup of tea and cereal in front of her, she smiled at both of us, “good to see you Serena have a good lie in.” she simply replied “No, my hot water bottle got out of my bed.” I lifted my coffee cup and saluted her, got a wonderful smile in return. Jenny left us with a wink, Serena noticed the page on the newspaper, and placed her hand on mine and quietly said, " She's at peace now love.” I gave her a weak smile back and nodded "I have to go; I have Cadet Jackson calling at 10. Maybe you'd care to join us for lunch?"  
”I’d like to, thank very much you.”  
  
We smiled again I got up and walked back to my room, leaving the paper behind I busied myself by getting the cups, saucers and small plates ready for the chocolate hobnobs on a tray, had a quick look round, and went to sit down on the sofa, had a few hours to wait so I tried to do a crossword.  
  
I must have dozed off as I woke to a gentle knock on the door, a head poked around the door it was Jenny again, "Sorry Bernie your visitor is here, do you need couple of minutes?"  
  
”no it's okay thank you.”  
  
I started to stand up, when Cadet Jackson came in, wearing her uniform, why was I so pleased she was a she? I guess she reminded me a little of me at the same age I guess. "Please sit down, um", she hesitated. "Do you have you got a vase?" She was holding a wonderful bouquet of summer flowers, we smiled nervously.  
  
”let me show you, there is a vase in the kitchen we can make a cup of tea at the same time, unless you prefer coffee, “I slowly walked into the kitchen and in passing switched on the kettle.  
  
"Tea will be lovely thank you." I shook my head; I tried to figure out why she suddenly looked worried.  
  
”No, no child I should be saying thank you for my flowers they are beautiful, you shouldn't have.” she let out her breath slowly, smiled again.  
  
"No it's okay I wanted to partly to say thank you for seeing me and partly for letting me talk to you."  
  
She carried the tray through while I carried the vase and those wonderful flowers; I placed them on the bureau. We sat opposite each other, daring each other to be the first to speak. I thought it had better be me, I first poured out tea and I started to dunk my biscuit, she beat me to it.  
  
"You remind me so much of my Gran,"  
  
”All good I hope, “she grinned at me, and said "Oh yeah total rebel, shall we start?"  
  
”Where would you like to start,”  
I took a long breath wondering what to say and what to leave out, she did have a wonderful smile which reminded me  
  
"Why the Army I can understand why you wanted to be a Medic and specialise in trauma,” it was that simple statement I knew I had a kindred spirit, I saw myself in her full of hope and dread in equal measures for the future.  
  
I started to explain my uncle Alistair had been in the Army and told us stories of his time in service, and that was how I met and married my fellow medic student Marcus while we we're at uni, how my eldest child had followed us into medicine but his little sister became a well respected lawyer. I hesitated in mentioning my affair with Alex. This ended my marriage and our subsequent non marriage, so I didn’t. That could wait for another day.  
  
She made some notes and there was a knock on the door, and once again it was Jenny, "Sorry to bother you ladies but Bernie's its lunch time."  
  
Lizzy looked at her watch “gosh that was quick can we meet again if it's okay with you?” Jenny helped me stand up, I turned to Lizzy, "I would be honoured if you would join me and my neighbour for lunch, I think it's braised steak n vet and jam roly poly pud hopefully with custard,"  
  
”or ice cream, honestly Bernie you and custard, and like the Major said your more than welcome, “Lizzie grinned and held out her arm for me to take, "I'd be honoured." she shyly replied.  
  
We walked towards the dinning room, I went to knock on her door and Jenny pointed out she was already sitting at the table waiting for us.  
  
We had a very enjoyable lunch, kept the conversation to general matters, she saw me back to my room, good as her word she did come back and even after getting all the information she wanted continued to come back to visit me and Serena.  
  
We did eventually talk a little bit about Alex and Serena who kept shushing me, “Berience she doesn't want to know about me, its you she's come to see.” Lizzie kept on coming to see us long after she had completed her research and to be totally honest both Serena and I really looked forward to her visits, then on one visit she brought a young lady with her and she was introduced to us as Hannah her partner and future wife.  
  
Several months later we jointly got a wedding invitation it was an autumn wedding for Miss Elisabeth Jackson and Miss Hannah Jones because we needed some additional help. We asked if our co conspirator could come so Jenny became our + 0ne. which was readily agreed on. As I looked at Serena Wendy Campbell, we were both well wrapped up for the autumnal weather, I did think we should have got married, Serena whispered in my ear during the ceremony “no regrets Major other we're together now and what happened is long in the past, and I will never ever stop loving you, and forever in your debt for your forgiveness.” I started to say something but she put her index finger on my lips and our engagement ring caught the sunlight. We were honoured to be sitting at the top table which was reserved for family only, we even met her Grandma Elaine who was as Lizzie and Hannah described a true rebel and I got reminded by Jenny and Serena a lot like me even in my dotage.  
  
It was coming up to Christmas, I very quickly developed a cold, which was a stubborn one, and soon developed into a chest infection and I was confined to barracks so to speak i.e. In my room and bed, I really tried to get rid of it as I had my or should I say our wedding was coming up in the first week in January. However I think I knew my time was coming to a close, with permission from Lottie and Cameron I wanted to give my military medals and MBE to newly promoted and qualified RMCA Elisabeth Jones or Lizzy as she insisted I call her.  
  
As I lay dying Cam told me he had found Alex, but she had thought it was for the best we'd never meet, and she would always love me unconditionally as did I did her. Luckily for me Serena understood and never questioned it.  
  
When it came for my wonderful brave mum to leave us, with Jenny's help we got a comfy double-bed so she and Serena could share the limited time they had together. And that's how we found them wrapped in each other's arms, we'd been sent away the previous night.  
  
We didn't hesitate in giving them a joint funeral; they were buried together in the Wolfe family plot. We asked Captain Elisabeth Jones, to be pall-bearers; she wore her RMCA dress uniform, wearing with permission from her commanding officer mum’s medals and her MBE. As to her one true love Serena Wendy Wolfe they got married just before the chest infection really took hold and it was only correct and fitting her nephew Jason Haynes, Evie Fletcher was hers.  
  
We put on their joint headstone "here lies Major and Mrs Berience Grizelda and Serena Wendy Wolfe very much the one, forever loved by their children, and grandchildren."  
  


**Author's Note:**

> changed some spelling and a few sentences.


End file.
